…life from my perspective


Damnit – I can’t sleep. I usually don’t have this problem as I pride myself on getting 8-9 solid hours of sleep EVERY NIGHT. My family and friends argue me down that health professionals recommend 5-7 or 6-8 hours per night. HELL NO – it’s 7-9. They just be trying to legitimize their reasons for calling me lazy, secretly hating on the fact that I get the sleep hours THEY wished they were getting.  Anywhoo, I’m not really suffering from insomnia so much as it is anxiety. TODAY was the Mega Millions $300-something lottery drawing. I bought 2 tickets and didn’t win shit. As a matter of fact, I only matched one number out of six; the number 4. My girl bought a few tickets too and she told me the jackpot increased by about $10 million to $350 million since nobody won tonight. She said we have another chance to press our luck on Friday. My ass gone buy like 5 tickets.

My friend told me that she was thinking about what she would do if she actually came into that kind of cash. I told her I WAS TOO and I already got it laid out. Every family member, friend, lover and person that I had some MEANINGFUL interaction with would get a piece of the pie. I also have a few charitable organizations that I would break a piece off real proper like. I would personally invite everyone to a formal, black tie affair where their cash would be in the form of a cashiers check in a sealed envelope that lay on their dinner plate. I would give a speech, via video conference from Morocco, about the impact each person present at the dinner made on my life. How our interaction shaped me, for the good and for the bad, into the woman I am today. I would give an honorable mention to the men that loved me and left me and to those who couldn’t commit to me; I’d let them know they wasn’t shit BUT I had love for them because they taught me A LOT about who I AM and what love IS NOT. I would also explain how the dollar amount of my gift reflected the role each person held in my life.  Knowing me for a long time doesn’t necessitate a larger cash gift over someone who may have misused me once or twice; the dynamic of the interaction is what carries the greatest value. To that end, there would be a lot of jiggas who would walk away with $200. A very polite and indirect way of telling them to fuck off I presume. It’s the thought that counts right? Blood relatives would get their cut NOT BECAUSE THEY EARNED IT (some ain’t never serviced me) but because they share my parent’s bloodline and looking after them is my duty. My Mama, sister and Toe would get the bulk of it.

I’d still go to London on scholarship, purchase me a flat and camp out over there for a few years. I ain’t opening no damn school or investing in no music label, barber shop or church. I would propel We Running Things to the next level, create healthier options to eradicate the food deserts in the ghetto and give away free books once a month every year; THEN I’d go under the radar. My next mission would be to scope out Nas, Jay-Elect and John Mayer. I got cash now jiggas – I can pay to play.

The moral to the story, if there is one, is don’t block your blessings.  As I mentioned in a previous post, blessings are one of the many manifestations of God’s presence in the world and they come THROUGH PEOPLE.  Though this is a VERY NARROW perspective on God and his divine virtue, the bottom line is don’t service others just so you can cash in if they ever win the mega millions. Just do good because it’s the “right”eous thing to do; be good for goodness sake.  In the end we ALL win.

3 comments on “$300 MIL INSOMNIA!!

  1. Z*Ala
    January 5, 2011

    KIWI! i’m lovin this post. The fact that you have a plan for the money is the dopeness. WOndering if i would be at the black tie affair and if i was, how much my casihers check would be for? lol… Go on and pay to play, but i bet at that point u aint really gon want none dem niccas. Bet! owww, and dem niccas that taught you what love IS NOT, ha…they gon be salty w dey 200bucks, cuz i bet they think they did right by you…
    When you go on the low, tell me where you be so i can meet you there and we can get our travel on and poppin.

    • nisavidan
      January 6, 2011

      NO MA!! You ain’t NEVER the $200 recipient!! HA HA!! You done put me up on too much game for me to play you like that.

      You enjoyed this blog entry? See what unemployment will do? I have developed an imagination overnight!!!

      I’m trying to be diligent with the daily posts but when the spirit hits me I RUN with it. I’m trying to be more engaging and less boring like my sister said!!

  2. Z*Ala
    January 6, 2011

    I’m engaged. you on it! Thank Godess for the email alerts!

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